Sorry, Officer, I didn’t realize my radar detector wasn’t plugged in.
Hey, you must’ve been doin’ about 125mph to keep up with me! Good job!
That uniform makes you look really big.
Excuse me. Is “stick up” hyphenated?
I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a Police Officer.
You don’t happen to have any beer in your car?
I was going to be cop, but I decided to finish high school instead.
Your not gonna check the trunk, are you?
“Lets do it different this time… I will give you the breathalyzer test, now stick this in your mouth and blow”
Did you happen to attend the “Barney Fife” Police Academy?
I can’t reach my license unless you hold my beer.
When you smack me up, make sure you smile pretty for the camcorder
I bet I could grab that gun before you finish writing my ticket
Is it true that people become cops because they are too dumb to work at McDonalds?
I pay your salary!
So, uh, you on the take, or what?
Those sirens are hurting my ears, turn them off or I am not speaking to you.
So what if I was speeding, whatcha gonna do about it Mr. Hotshot?
Gee,officer! That’s terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning, too!
Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay just so one of us does.
I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes I know there is no other car around, that’s how far they are ahead of me.
So, are you still crabby because your mamma didn’t let you play with your gun when you were little?
Sorry I can’t hear you over the radio. No I am not turning it down, I love this song. Either speak up or just leave me alone.
What do you mean have I been drinking? Your the trained specialist.
Well, when I reached down to pick up my bag of crack, my gun fell off my lap and got lodged between the brake pedal and gas pedal, forcing me to speed out of control.
Hey is that a 9 mm? That’s nothing compared to this .44 magnum.